Ugh!! The holiday season just plain sucks for someone who is grieving. Halloween, Thanksgiving and now...CHRISTMAS! How does anyone make it through without losing their mind? Here is what the experts say:
1. Don't worry about traditions...do whatever you can to just get through even if that means not setting up the tree, making your holiday rounds or doing anything that will bring you down even more than where you already are.
2. Do something new and different. Maybe travel or spend Christmas some place other than where all of the memories are.
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For our first Christmas following the death of our child, we decided to spend it at a hotel that had a pool. The other children seemed to enjoy it and it was a nice diversion. Setting up the tree that year was the toughest. Everytime I pulled out her "first ornament" one with her picture, or something symbolic...I would fall to my knees and sob. I did manage to hang her stocking along with all the others. Somewhere I read to write her a letter and place it in the stocking. I did.
The next Christmas I pulled out the letter from the last...cried...and wrote another.
The Christmas after that...the same.
That was 11 Christmas's ago. My letters have gotten better and when I read them, I can see how far I have come in my grief.
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